The Role of an Independent Wedding Celebrant.

I wrote this blog as my first assignment for my wedding celebrant training.

I've been thinking about weddings quite a bit lately, as we'll celebrate our 30th anniversary in December 2025. We envisioned our ceremony as a lavish event with a grand, opulent venue and an endless guest list. What actually happened was vastly different. Linda, my wife, had adopted our daughter in a previous marriage, and social services approached us about adopting her half-brother. The best way to proceed was to go to the adoption panel as a married couple. The panel was scheduled to meet in January 1996, and this was October 1995. The wedding was arranged in about five weeks, and it significantly differed from our original plans.

We chose a small venue and sent invites to fifty guests. The money we saved on this more compact version was spent on music (I was the Director of Music in a secondary school at the time). Blackburn Cathedral's organist, the school's senior choir, a brass ensemble, and a string quartet all performed for us! In retrospect, it was a wonderful day that we still think about, and it was better than our original plan. We passed the adoption panel and adopted our second child, Wayne. Later, we adopted two more children and had kinship care for two grandchildren.

In April, we will celebrate the two-year anniversary of our daughter Tia’s marriage to Lochy. Their wedding was humanist, with their chosen wording, structure, and rituals. There were plenty of kilts, Highland cows, a string quartet, a pianist, and a fabulous wedding band. Despite the high cost, the day was precisely what they had envisioned.

I had been toying with the idea of becoming a wedding celebrant for some time when two dear friends asked if I could officiate their September wedding in their back garden overlooking a beautiful loch. They stipulated that they would choose everything, and there should be no religious elements. I agreed but stipulated that I must first undergo independent celebrant training. I wanted to do my job correctly with the right skills and knowledge. I had an introductory session with Dinah Liversidge at the Celebrant Coaching and Training Academy, after which I enrolled and started my first module training to be a wedding celebrant.

I have been studying, researching, and reading about professional celebrants, and I find it all quite fascinating. Did you know, for example, what types of ceremonies a celebrant can carry out for couples in the UK?

The first is obvious – weddings. These are bespoke ceremonies tailored to a couple’s unique love story and values. There is no one-size-fits-all template, and they are highly personalised, often featuring a couple’s choice of readings and music. They may choose traditional elements such as walking down the aisle, making vows, exchanging rings, and, of course, the “you may now kiss” finale. They could, however, choose to do their day differently: walking in together, making children integral to the ceremony, including religious, spiritual, or ancient customs, or creating new ones.

The most important thing to remember is that these celebrations are not legally binding. The legal marriage or civil partnership occurs with a local authority registrar, in front of witnesses, and in accordance with UK law, before the couple’s special day.

Celebrants can also design and lead vow renewals to commemorate significant anniversaries of the couple’s wedding or other milestones. Commitment ceremonies celebrate a couple’s relationship and commitment in a non-legally binding manner.

I am joining the industry at an exciting time, as there is an ongoing parliamentary discussion about wedding celebrants. So, what is the current review process for wedding celebrants, and when can we expect to hear the outcomes?

Marriage law in England and Wales dates back to 1836, regulating how and where religious and civil ceremonies can occur. Only civil registrars and selected religious leaders can legally register a marriage, which must be conducted in approved venues or places of worship. Independent celebrants are not currently central to the legal process, and couples must fulfil the legal obligations before having ‘their day, their way.’ 

The Law Commission published the findings of a review of marriage law in 2022. They recommended that officiants should be regulated rather than venues, greater flexibility in ceremony locations was needed, and independent celebrants should be on the same legal footing as humanist celebrants in Scotland, Northern Ireland, and Jersey. Should these proposals materialise, independent celebrants could provide a genuine alternative to religious or civil ceremonies. The industry believes such proposals might allow independent celebrants to officiate civil partnerships.

In the House of Lords debate of 18th October 2024, Lord Ponsonby noted that the government needed time to assess any proposed changes and should consider them along with other matters of marriage law, emphasising that the process will be slow but thorough. The chamber expressed frustration over the slow pace of reform and demanded a clear timeline. However, it is widely acknowledged that real change is still possible as long as the debate continues. It is worth noting that the proposed changes in England and Wales are specific to those two countries and do not automatically extend to Scotland, which has its own legal framework for marriage.

Having seen a humanist celebrant in action (my daughter’s wedding), I was keen to answer the question, what are the key differences between a humanist celebrant and an independent celebrant?

A humanist celebrant tends to be an atheist or agnostic. Their ceremonies lack religious content, while independent celebrants’ beliefs vary. They can include religious or spiritual elements, creating a ceremony that reflects a couple’s values and principles. While both independent and humanist ceremonies are personal and meaningful to the couple concerned, independent celebrants can span a broader range, from entirely secular to including religious readings, prayers, or hymns.

Humanist celebrants in Scotland, Northern Ireland, and Jersey can perform legal marriages. In contrast, independent celebrants throughout the UK rely on a registrar to handle all legal aspects before officiating their couple’s special day. In summary, humanist celebrants hold non-religious ceremonies rooted in humanist values, while independent celebrants offer greater flexibility and, therefore, more customisation for couples.

My tutor recommends that I join the A.O.I.C. (Association of Independent Celebrants). What would be the benefits to my clients of my being a member of the A.O.I.C.?

Clients would certainly benefit from a high level of competence and skill, as I would adhere to the A.O.I.C. code of practice. The insurance they provide would give my couples peace of mind, and I would know that the continuing professional development they offer would ensure that I’m always giving clients my very best. If anything arose from my discussions with couples, I would feel that I could turn to the A.O.I.C. for support through counselling, emotional support, and debriefing, which would, in turn, enable me to give my clients a better service.

Couples can find the perfect celebrant for their needs by searching the A.O.I.C.'s network of experienced celebrants. Furthermore, if I were indisposed on the day, someone would always be available to step in. By choosing an A.O.I.C. celebrant, couples would benefit from my skill in crafting and delivering meaningful ceremonies. They could feel secure knowing that all members are committed to providing a professional and personalised service.

When I began researching the idea of becoming a celebrant, I was surprised by the variety of ceremonies available. So, what other ceremonies might a couple seek a celebrant for after a wedding?

I have mentioned vow renewals and commitment ceremonies, but celebrants can also help mark significant anniversaries with a special ceremony reflecting a couple’s journey. Furthermore, celebrants can assist in marking other important life events, such as a couple’s retirement or a significant achievement, with a personalised milestone ceremony. There are also baby-naming ceremonies where celebrants can officiate non-religious ceremonies to welcome a new baby into the family. Additionally, there are adoption ceremonies in which a new child can be welcomed, even using rituals like handfasting to bind the adopted child and the family together. A celebrant can also perform special ceremonies following gender reassignment. Finally, families often turn to a trusted celebrant to conduct funerals and memorial services to honour the life of a loved one.

Thank you for joining me on my journey so far. I hope this blog has given you an idea of the types of ceremonies a celebrant can conduct for couples in the UK, the current political landscape regarding wedding celebrants, and the key differences between a humanist and an independent celebrant. I have also found it fascinating to explore the benefits for couples of being a member of the A.O.I.C. and the wide range of ceremonies an independent celebrant can offer.

I am off to learn more, starting with Jeltje Fordon Lennox’s book, Crafting Meaningful Wedding Rituals – A Practical Guide (Jessica Kingsley Publishers). Wish me luck!

Stuart Butterworth - Celebrant in Training